How to teach a child to play independently

A child playing in a sandbox on his own often causes emotion from many parents. After all, here it is - the baby, he goes through the molds, pours the sand into the bucket, transports it by truck. And only your crumb goes behind you with a tail, constantly asks you to play with him. Is it important to play independently?

When the kid fumbles among the toys, mothers breathe a sigh of relief - well, everything, there is a little time to do household chores - to stroke the laundry, to make dinner, to wipe the floors. But the ability to play independently is not only important for mom. When the kid himself comes up with a plot for his game, he develops imagination and thinking. When he tries to understand why the rings do not fit the base of the pyramid - he turns on logic. And when he begins to speak for his heroes, you can understand what a crumb thinks about, which disturbs him. One mother in a conversation with a psychologist told me that her child in the game punished the bear by going to kindergarten. Like, bear, broke a toy - go to the kindergarten. Later it turned out that the child was not comfortable there, no one played with him, he felt like an outcast in the group. Watching your child’s independent games will help you better understand his inner world.

How to push a child to play independently

But how to begin to act so that the baby no longer relies on your actions and instructions in the game? First of all, take a back seat. No need to tell the child what to do in this game. Do not tell the baby that it is better to build a tower not from covers, but from cubes. Do not force to put on a stripped doll and finally collect her hair. Do not strive to constantly clean up the toys of the child. Take the child's games as they are. Do not change everything in your own way. And the kid will begin to improvise more, to compose, to invent.

If you want to achieve independence of the child, give him this independence in other areas of life. If the baby does not want to eat soup, do not feed him by force, with persuasion and threats. Just accept that the baby really does not want to eat this soup. If the crumb does not want to wear the notorious jumpsuit - pick up what your child likes, not you. Frequently ask him a question about the current situation. Ask the child what he would do in one way or another, what he thinks about this or that. Children who are given the right to vote and reasonable choice become more self-confident, they do not suffer from the fear of crossing the legal limit. By giving your child the right to such independence, you teach him to play without help.

Plots for self-play

Some children can't play, no matter how strange it may sound. In addition to banal skating machines and assembling the designer, they can not imagine other activities. First of all, you need to teach your child to play. Plot-role-playing games develop imagination, diction, acting game. And in general, such games are very useful and interesting. Often the child invents the game himself, depending on what he saw or heard in the near future. But in some cases, the child must help parents to make the game a reality.

  1. Cafe. If a child recently visited a catering establishment, he probably noticed who the waiters are, what they do and how they behave. Offer to put bears, dolls and hares at the table, and bring plates, spoons, forks yourself. Tell your child to feed the little visitors, wash the dishes for them and remember to take money for a treat.
  2. Dolls Games with dolls can be the most diverse. The simplest is Daughters-mothers, when there is a family and some dolls perform their functions in it. It is very interesting to play in Kindergarten - a large doll can be a teacher, and others - children. You can drive dolls to visit, go to the store for them, arrange a small hairdresser.
  3. Doctor. If the child has a medical kit, this is another interesting doctor game. You can line up all the patients - a bear, I love with a dummy, dolls, a cow, a hippopotamus. And everyone needs help! Someone needs to drip medicine into the nose, another one has to be heard with the indication “Breathe, do not breathe,” the third leg hurts - urgently it is necessary to band it. As the game progresses, the baby will invent all new and new plots - give him this opportunity.
  4. Cook. A great manifestation of independence - cooking. Of course, you cannot entrust a knife to a three-year-old child, but even a child can chop the lettuce leaves, mix the chopped fruits and decorate the dish with greens. Give crumbs freedom of thought.
  5. Cars. If your child likes to play with cars - great. On sale there are special overpasses with a large number of cross and serpentine roads - this toy will surely suit your child. You can carry dolls on a taxi, follow the rules of the road, catch up with one car and another, and even unload buttons or beans.
  6. Animals If you have a lot of animals in your arsenal, you can arrange an improvised circus or even a zoo. Let the elephant sell tickets, and the monkey reminds that animals can be fed with cookies and apples.

In all games, try not to get into action before the kid asks you about it. Even after that, do not make all the decisions - ask the baby what the fox is sick with and how to get to the department store by car. The most important rule for these games is to cause a child to take initiative.

What if the child does not want to play alone

Sometimes it happens that the baby plays in your presence, but once you leave the room - he immediately lags behind your tail. In this case, you need to go to the trick. Leave in a visible place a stack of postcards, a jar with buttons, a bag with shreds and lace. But do not give the child this right in the hands. As you know, the forbidden fruit is sweet and mysterious things will certainly attract your baby. Take care in advance that the buttons are large enough so that the child does not swallow them, so that the laces are not long. The child will play with such treasures even without your presence, believe me. This will allow him to get used to a new state of independence.

How to support the child in the game

If your child does not want to be alone, do not rush to run away from him. Here are a few rules that will help you support and motivate your child to play independently.

  1. To begin with, make sure that the gaming area is comfortable, comfortable, and most importantly, safe. Remove all the valuable things that a child can spoil, close the sockets, lift the wires, get rid of dangerous objects. After all, an independent game involves staying in a room without adults. In addition, the game area should be comfortable. Arrange the toys so that you can immediately play with them - dolls at the dinner table, crockery on a toy plate, the bear sleeps in the crib, pencils with an album for drawing at hand.
  2. Even if you are going to go about your business, you should not move away from the child too far. If you are cooking dinner in the kitchen, from time to time look at your child. And of course, be always ready to answer all questions and comments of the child. He should still feel your presence. Ask your child regularly what he builds from the designer, who he draws and why Masha did not get the doll a cup of tea.
  3. Sometimes children throw an independent game at a time when they have something wrong. At this time, you should immediately come to the aid of your child. Help him to insert the missing puzzle, help solve the puzzle and put the right ring on the pyramid and the game will continue again - without the vagaries and nerves.
  4. Do not interrupt the child, do not tell him that he is doing something wrong. Do not scold the baby, do not forbid him to run, jump and carry toys around the house. Now - he is the king of the game and you should not climb into this kingdom.
  5. It is very important to be proud of the successes of the child and to demonstrate them in public. If the kid painted a picture with paints, show him to the grandmother - she will certainly appreciate it. You can treat your dad with a salad prepared by a kid when he returns from work.

By following these simple recommendations, you can gently push the child to play independently.

If the child does not want to play separately, attach him to adult affairs. During the harvesting, you can give the crumbs a small cloth. Small children perfectly imitate their parents - they try to cope with a vacuum cleaner, they rub the floor and walls, they carry a broom.

Teaching a child to play independently, do not overdo it. It's one thing when a baby is with his mother all the time and can't even move away from her for a minute. Another thing is when the crumb spent the whole day in the kindergarten without your presence and trying to spend time in your society. Drop everything, forget about problems at work, talk with pleasure and play with your child for at least half an hour. And then, being much fed up with you, the child will again be able to occupy himself. And you do not need to send a child to the nursery to play with toys when parents are in the living room, watching TV, chatting. This is at least cruel.

The ability to play independently is not only an opportunity for parents to release a few minutes for themselves. This is the ability of the child to think, create, invent, express emotions. Teach your child to dream, and his mind will be much deeper.

Watch the video: How To Get Your Child to Play Independently - Q&A With Dana (December 2019).